Crying with Joy

Wow…

I just got a package in the mail today from DonorsChoose.org – Not unbidden – I made a donation in October. But this package blew my mind.

I’m sitting here in tears…tears for the heartbreak and joy of how gifting so little can mean so much to others….tears for the pleasure of seeing the joy in those kids eyes because of the project I funded…tears for the joy of seeing the results of offering just a little bit of love where I could -

The package has pictures – lots and lots of pictures – and thank you notes from the children who were touched by the donation…

The best part is – doing something that for me was small and easy, contributed to delight and play and awareness and growth for 20 kids.

Results of DonorsChoose.org Donation

Check out DonorsChoose.org, won’t you?

• You get to pick what project you fund.
• You even get to pick WHERE your donation goes.
• You get updates and feedback when it’s done.

I chose to fund a whole project, and even *that* was possible with just a small donation.  I funded this project with $300, but for me that was totally easy at the time.

Even if you only have $5 you can gift these kids.

Check it out, won’t you?

Still teary,
g

Rant-page

I’m having a fantastic glass of Clos du Bois 2004 (or two)…a feat I generally only take on about once in a 3-4 month cycle….along with a flaming rant or two.

So here’s my quarterly Rant-page.

I need these occasionally – I know I’m just grieving my yearning to be loved, devoured, desired.

But I do hope you enjoy it with the same dark humor I have!
dark girl

—————–
Pre-Rant

If you had a terminal disease, what would you do to die complete?
I got news for ya’, we all have a terminal disease -
it’s called Life.
100% mortality rate.
Tomorrow’s not promised to you.
What are you waiting for???

———————
Rant 1

“What else do you want to know about me?”
For the 10th time, you say.
What?? It’s getting a little bit old.
That’s very funny, Casanova.
Ever heard, “make it all about her”?
Here’s your question -
What do you think you have
to open me
that’s better
than every other emotional/spiritual 12-year-old
who wants to be up inside me?
You’re so funny, Narcissismo.
———————
Rant 2

I’m so sick of
men collapsing
I say I’m poly – he says he’s sad.
I won’t mother his fears – now he’s hurt and mad
I can’t open my mouth without him collapsing!
What’s so painful
that death can’t conquer it?
Please figure out how to burn through it
Find your freedom
Don’t bury it. Burn through it to Transcendance.
In other words -
Get a freaking backbone!
————-

I have more, but I think that’s quite enough for now.

…

LOL ok one more – all my fave music in one fell swoop:

New Post – On Fear (and Freedom from it!)

Just posted this:

On Fear (and Freedom from it!):

>> http://is.gd/bda1

You can also find it directly, here:

>> http://theintegratedapproach.wordpress.com/2008/12/11/on-fear/

I’d Like To Teach The World To Sing…

This is an extract from an email conversation I’m having…

Ahhhh…..

In wonder at the Witnessing of It All…
g-girl

Thank you for sharing this with me! I feel deep reverence and deep tenderness hearing it – cherishing that you’d share your truth with me (no matter how painful, no matter how you fear i might respond).

Thank you.

> When I think of me and you and polyamory I feel sad, to be honest.

Mmmmmmmmmm….

I know You know this already —

((( I hope that by re-naming it it might either support you, or give us something fun to play with together in conversation later — )))

The yearning in you – the universal need
that gives rise in you to this sadness
is a key to your Fullness – to your spiritual opening and Being.
a key to Who You Most Deeply Are.

Find that universal need, that yearning,
and grieve / release the ache of it.
When you can crystallize out the power of the yearning
from the emotion of the sadness,
Whatever universal need / yearning you’re left with,
You’ll be able to use powerfully toward your own
exquisite fulfillment….satisfaction….delight….
or
You can use to open the world.

Here’s an article a friend just sent me that plays through this inquiry
starting with the emotion of jealousy,
and through the process
reveals Source and Freedom:
http://www.planetwaves.net/jealousy.html

For you – replace every occurrence of the word ‘jealousy’
with the word ’sadness’
and then see where the process begins to feel true for YOU.

With reverence, love, and blessings,
g-girl

Louis Black on Homeland Security

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i love Louis Black.

“Homeland security is a problem. It’s a good idea, but it’s a problem because the man who runs it is Tom Ridge, and he is someone who has the leadership qualities of a gerbil. He was a part of coming up with what is known as the color coded system of security. You know, orange, and yellow, and what ever the f*** the others are. And what’s stupid about it is they have the color coding. LIKE WE’RE IN F***IN’ ELEMENTARY SCHOOL!! There’s no need for that. Because every time they tell us what the color is, then they have to f***in’ EXPLAIN it, so GET RID OF the f***in’ color! Simplify it. There should be three levels of security: ‘Jesus Christ’, ‘God damn it!’, ‘F*** ME!’”

lol ohhhhhhh

Jealousy and Polyamory

A friend sent me this link which I think is a SENSATIONAL treatment of the subject, and the opportunity, of jealousy.

http://www.planetwaves.net/jealousy.html

Thank you Tom Goddard!!!

yum

Dissolving into Isness

I’m hanging out a bit with the Deida community again.  On a post there I wrote this quote, and it was quoted back to me as being helpful, so I thought I’d share it here.  It’s a part of my regular practice:

I ask myself, “What’s left in me when activism/action, surrender/release to God, and distraction are no longer options?”

It leaves me burning in the fire. It leaves me grieving. And when the full grief and the fire finally dissolve, i’m left….Open beyond myself…

Omniverse

Cool and trippy video here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6D3CgF8_qk

Woohhhh so cool.

Xmas Gift For You – Downloads

I found this great resource and got all happy to share it!

So as an end-of-the-year Thank You and Xmas gift,

may I offer you these

25 Gift Downloads.

>> http://philosophersnotes.com/freebies/IFG

From Deepak and Dyer to Abraham-Hicks and Tolle

and more amazingly inspirational works,

when you click this link and sign in,

you’ll have access to the

Top 25 PhilosophersNotes Titles – FREE!

>> http://philosophersnotes.com/freebies/IFG

With love, gratitude, and wishes for happy holidays,
Enjoy!
Gail

Conversation with Polly

I just had this conversation with sweet friend Polly van der Linde, which inspired me to share it here….

g-girl

My facebook entry today:

Gail feels relieved and liberated, having successfully peeled away yet another layer of fear.

Polly: What fears do you have? I can’t imagine you having them? Didn’t know you had any vulnerabilities. You hide them well. you’re like me.

Gail:  You’re so cute. This layer of fear was fear about sharing with a group of my colleagues that my savings is running out. I was afraid they’d see me as unqualified to work with them because of this. I felt shame for not having better succeeded at generating infinite wealth that would account for my sustainability while launching The Institute For Grace Un-Church. Now I feel more peaceful, my shame is gone. I can say, “Yes, I was off-track in my previous ventures, and it resulted in me not having as much of a cushion as I’d like now. But I’m clear that this is what I’m meant to be doing next. And it’s going to take time to restore my foundation. I don’t know how that will happen. I don’t know what IFG is going to look like. But I’d like your help with it.”

Curious what you think, reading this!!
love,
g-girl

Polly van der Linde

Today at 3:32pm

please tell me more about IFG. I totally get your “shame” thing. Chat with me now and I’ll tell you how I let my hair down similiarly

Gail Taylor

Today at 3:37pm

Mmmmmmmmmm….

I can only tell you 3 short things about IFG -

A few weeks ago, during a meditation on, “what am I most meant to do with this lifetime?” the phrase came to me, “I’m here to (do my best to) live as a face of the Divine – as a face of Spirit.”

I know what “live as a face of the Divine” means to me – 3 things specifically…but I thought, “huh?! what does that mean for career and income?”

The next day this phrase came out of my meditation, “The Institute For Grace Un-Church”. I was taken by a day of writing that drove through me, not from my thinking or from my mind, but that generated itself (if you know that experience).

This was part of it:

“The purpose for The Institute For Grace Unchurch is to create community (opptys to meet like-minded friends), co-resourcing, and practice opportunities for people who want to Live Life as a Sacred Practice.”

That’s pretty much all I know right now. I’m talking to friends to see what they think. I’m clear this is what’s meant for me to create next (or to help emerge, co-created with others).

That’s all I know (so far).

What do you think?
g-girl